Mean Boys
by hermanas.grimm
Summary: AU Basically Mean Girls, One Piece style. Trying to find his place in his new school, Ace crosses paths with the meanest group of all - the cool and calculating Law, leader of the schools most popular clique, the Hearts. Rated T in the beginning, later moved to Rated M.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I DO NOT own One Piece or Mean Girls/Queen Bees and Wannabes. I only enjoy mashing them together.**

Chapter 1

The warm summer breeze brushes through the trees of the neighborhood on this early Monday morning. Birds rhythmically chirping as cars are driving past the street. I crouched on the patio step, readjusting my jeans that kept getting caught behind the tongue of my shoe. My parents hovering over me as they simultaneously repeat one word after another regarding my first day of school.

"This is your lunch, okay. Now I put some money in there so you can buy some milk . . . you can ask one of the older guys where to do that." My father, Rodger informs me as he hands me the brown paper bag.

"You remember our phone number? I wrote it down for you, just in case. .put it in your pocket, I don't want you to lose it." My mother, Rouge adds. She stretches the tiny white paper to me; I take it and put it behind the back pocket of my jeans. "Okay, you ready?" she asked.

I rise up eagerly; smiling to both of them "I think so."

My mom takes a step beside me and my dad takes a step back, pulling out a camera from his pocket as my mom as we ready ourselves to take a photo.

"Ace's big day!" My dad cheers, while my mom holds onto me trying not to appear as hysterical as she already was for the photo.

It's natural for parents to cry on their child's first day of school. But that usually happens when the child is five, I'm seventeen and until today I was home schooled.

Yes, I know what you're thinking, home schooled kids are freaks or that we're weirdly religious or something. However, my family is completely normal; except for the fact that both my parents are research historians and we spent the last 12 years in Africa.

I had a great life, but then my mom got offered tenure at Columbia University, so it was goodbye Africa and hello high school.

"Have a good first day son" my mother shouts.

I turn around making my way across the street to the giant building know as Grand Line High School. Not really paying much attention to my surroundings, I fail to notice the big yellow bus nearly smashing into me. Thank god for my quick reflexes. I let out a panicked curse and turn to face my parents, who each wore a face of terror. I flash them a smile letting them know I was okay and that I'd be more careful before I make my way back to the building in front of me.

The high school was much larger once you went inside; luckily my class was on the first floor so I didn't have too much trouble finding it. Once entering the classroom I saw a tall guy with blond hair wearing a white button up shirt and a green vest, this guy definitely looked like he would be the teacher. I decided to approach him; good thing too, because I honestly had no clue what I was supposed to do, should I sit? Stand? Wait outside?

Walking up to the teacher, he only then looked at me like I was crazy. Am I doing this wrong? He's probably distracted thinking about the lecture….maybe I should just introduce myself?

I greet him with a friendly smile "Hi, I don't know if anyone told you about me? I'm a new student here, my names Ace Portgas" I extended my hand, not expecting the scowl that I received in return by my new instructor.

"Talk to me again and ill kick your ass" the 'teacher' said. Snickering could be heard in the background.

Did I miss something?

The supposed teacher then went to sit down at one of the desks in the front row. Oh god, don't tell me that guys a student? He looks like he graduated from college! As strange as that situation may be, I had decided to brush the encounter off and sit at the empty desk next to the now scowling blonde but just before taking a seat, some other blond interrupted.

"You don't want to sit there", the guy with the odd curly-brow said, eyes gesturing to the 'teacher' next to me. "Helmeppos boyfriend is going to sit there"

Right at that moment a short guy with pink hair took the seat in question.

"Hey baby" said the guy, who's in fact named Helmeppo, right before he grabbed the little pink-haired guy's face and proceeded to make out with him.

Okay, that was disturbing. I then moved to sit at the next available desk that was behind some strange guy in clown makeup. Once again, I was stopped by the same blonde with the odd brow. He and his green haired friend sitting behind him were shaking their heads in a way hinting 'no'.

"He farts a lot" the blonde whispered.

Seriously? . . .Whatever, fine, I decided to play the curly-brows game and walked back to the front of the room to wait for the teacher to assign me a seat.

"Hey everyone—"was all everyone heard before I unintentionally crashing right into the speaker-spilling his box of donuts and hot coffee all over his sweater.

"I am so sorry!" I pleaded as I knelt down to help pick up the box of perfectly wasted donuts.

Snickering could be heard behind me "it's not you . . . I'm just bad luck" the redhead sighed.

The redhead then proceeded to remove his now coffee stained sweater but seemed to be having some trouble. It was as if the sweater somehow glued itself to his undershirt which became unbeknown to the redhead, as he lifted up his sweater, showing off his perfectly sculpted abs.

"Mr. Shanks?" said an older gentleman, who looked like a man of authority. He was eyeing the red head as he halted his struggle with the offending sweater.

"My shirts stuck to my sweater isn't it?"Shanks uttered, sounding almost embarrassed.

"Yeah" I added. The man appeared to have drooped at that response.

"Fan-tastic" Shanks murmured.

The least I could do is help him out seeing as I probably ruined his breakfast, not to mention his wardrobe. I helped pull down his white undershirt and soon after, swiftly walked to an empty seat I managed to find while standing up there.

"Is everything alright in here?" the man with frightening yellow eyes questioned.

"Oh, yea..." Shanks replied while adjusting his shirt with a small blush.

The other-what seemed to be teacher- took a step forward to Mr. Shank while wearing a kind smile "So . . . how was your summer?" He asked

"I got divorced." Shanks stated coldly

"My carpal tunnel came back…" the other professor added.

Shanks only shot the other instructor a fake smile "I win!"

"Yes you do…" The teacher now had a nervous smile on his face then turned to look at the class. "Well, I just wanted to let everyone know that we have a new student joining us. He moved here all the way from Africa."

"Welcome!" Shanks greeted happily to the dark skinned male with the long nose and black curly hair who was sitting in the middle row.

"I'm from Brooklyn" he threw out.

The teacher pulled out a small paper from his pocket and read it out loud to everyone. "His name is Ace Portgas. Where are you Ace?"

"That's me" I abruptly inform him as I stood up from my seat to make myself known.

"Well, welcome Ace and thank you Mr. Mihawk" the red-head said

"Thank you, and listen" Mihawk stepped in closer to Shanks "if you need anything or if you just want to talk to somebody—"

"Thanks, maybe some other time when my shirt isn't see through."

"Okay…" his eyes wandered down to Mr. Shank's revealing shirt that exposed his fit torso. They stay locked there for quite a while unit he brought his attention back to the class. "Okay, good day everybody." Mihawk announces as he exited the room.

The first day of school was a blur. A stressful, surreal blur. I got in trouble for the most random things. For instance, during chemistry class I got scolded for excusing myself to go to the bathroom instead of asking the teacher for permission.

"Where do you think you're going?" Mr. Newgate asked.

"Oh, I—I have to go to the bathroom."

"You need the laboratory pass" he stated

"Alright, can I have the laboratory pass?" I ask him with a polite smile

"Nice try. Have a seat Portgas. " suddenly the class began to snicker as I slowly returned to my seat.

I have never lived in a world where adults didn't trust me. Where they were always yelling at me.

"Don't read ahead"

"No green pen"

"No food in class"

Then came lunch where I was even more lost. On the bright side, I managed to buy some milk on my own without having to ask any of the other guys for help. Slowly I scanned the cafeteria, searching for a suitable place to sit. I neared the table closest to me where I saw two familiar classmates of mine named Johnny and Yosaku. Immediately Johnny placed his backpack on the empty chair next to him and I instantly got the hint. Assholes.

Making my way down the rows of tables, I managed to find more empty seats. This one seemed decent and more welcoming than the last one. Three guys sat there, one being Killer from my Chemistry class. I was about to sit myself down next to them when I abruptly caught on with their odd conversation.

"I told you I saw the whole thing, everything!" one of the guys said.

"Did you see nipple? It only counts is you see nipple" Killer affirmed.

"That's true dude" the other guy agreed.

I had a lot of friends in Africa…But New York wasn't looking so hot.

At last I approached a table that was more fitting for me. That guy Usopp with the long nose was sitting there too, I knew I'd fit right in. Excitedly, I began to walk faster to the table in order to introduce myself.

"Jambo!" I address to all of them

"What?" Usopp says out loud to me while simultaneously talking on his phone.

I ended up eating my lunch on a toilet seat inside the bathroom. So far I hated this whole school thing, I just wanted it all to be over so I could go back home where everything was normal.

Finally the day was over with and I was allowed to leave. Walking up the porch, I was suddenly stopped by my mom and dad who were sitting on the patio looking through magazines.

"Hey, how was your first day?" My dad asked excitedly

I groaned in response, giving both of them nasty glares as I stepped inside. Honestly, how does anyone go through with this? And the worst part was there was still tomorrow...this was going to be a long year.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

I walked into class the next day determined not to bump into anyone and getting a good seat. As luck would have it, there was a seat next to that blonde curly brow, sure it was still in the same row as the farting clown but there was a seat in between so it wasn't within blast range. Quickly I took my seat, placing my books on the desk and removing my jacket, I began to nervously tap my desk waiting for class to begin.

Through the corner of my eye, I noticed the blonde and green-haired guy looking at me. Suddenly the large, tan man with the green hair spoke up.

"Is that a real tattoo?" he asked questionably

"Yeah" I replied back with an honest smile

"That's awesome." He then complemented

"Thanks" was all I managed to say in return

Suddenly out of nowhere, the green-haired guy grabbed my sleeve and pulled it over to his seat. He placed my arm side-by-side to his bulky one, using it as an example to show the blond sitting in front of him.

"Oi curly, you see? This is the lettering I want" the man holding on to my arm said to the blond

"This mosshead is Zoro; he's almost too gay to function." The blond guy said

"Nice to meet you" I stated while taking out a paper from my binder to look down at.

Soon another guy with long wavy blond hair and deep blue eyes began making his way down the aisle, insulting the curly-brow as he passed by.

"Nice wig Sanji, what's it made of?"

"Your mom's chest hair!" Sanji spat to the other blond. "I'm Sanji." he later addressed while genuinely smiling.

"Hi, I'm Ace" I smiled and introduced back "Um, do you guys know where room G14 is?"

Zoro took my paper that held my class schedule and began to scan over it, reading it out loud for Sanji to hear. "Health, Tuesday/ Thursday room G14."

"I think that's in the back building?" Sanji answered while the two looked at one another sharing an identical smirk.

"Yeah that's in the back building"

"We'll take you there" the blond insisted as Zoro handed me back my schedule.

"Thanks" I smiled graciously at them for being so nice as to help me out. And here I was thinking that Sanji was nothing but a jerk.

After the bell rang, Zoro took my wrist and Sanji pushed me from behind. Together they began pulling me through the massive hoard of students down the hall. "Watch out, new meat coming through" Zoro shouted through the crowd.

Soon we were outside and I proceeded to follow the two towards a giant tree next to the football field.

"Math, Spanish…wait, you're taking 12th grade calculus!?" Zoro said in shock as he scrolled down my schedule again to make sure hadn't misread anything.

"Yeah, I like math." I replied assertively

"Ew, why?" he said in disgust.

"Because it's the same in every county"

Zoro paused from walking, taking in my insightful words. He then looked at me with one eyebrow furrowed up as he began to pick up his pace again.

"That's touching, really, this guy is deep." Zoro stated sarcastically as he took a seat beside Sanji by the tree.

I continued to stand though, looking around in confusion. The other two, just sat there with their legs crossed, making themselves comfortable as I looked around in search of the health building that was nowhere to be found.

I looked at them weirdly before asking "Uh…Where's the back building?"

"It burned down in 1987" Sanji bluntly stated.

"Won't we get in some sort of trouble for this?" I couldn't help but worry.

"Why would we get you into trouble? We're your friends." I hesitantly remained standing there for a while. I know it's wrong to skip class, but Sanji said we were friends, and I was in no position to pass up friends. I guess I'll never know what I missed on that first day of health class.

_- Meanwhile in Health Class -_

_Mr. Vergo stood in front of the classroom with a big chalkboard behind him and the words 'SAFE SEX' written on it. He stood tall and firm as he paced back and forth from the chalkboard, awkwardly lecturing his class with his intimidating voice._

_"__Don't have sex, because you will get the girl pregnant …and die. Don't have sex in the missionary position; don't have sex standing up…you know what, just don't it, promise? …okay, good now everybody take some rubbers."_

"Why don't they just keep homeschooling you?" Sanji asked

"They wanted me to get socialized" I replied, making coma signs with my two fingers as i emphasized the word 'socialize'.

"Oh you'll get socialized alright, a guy like you" Zoro straightforwardly declared.

I couldn't help but look at him in mere confusion. "Eh…what are you talking about?"

"Let me put it to you this way, half the guys in this school are either gay or bi. But hey, that's what happened when you're put in an all guy's school. Face it Ace, you're a regulation hottie" The blond informed me as he finished the last of his cigarette that I wasn't even aware of.

"A what?"

"Own it!" Zoro proudly said as he swung his arm over my shoulder, wearing a smirk on his face that showed off some of his white teeth.

"Oh shit, would you look at Penguins gym clothes?"

"Of course all the hearts are in the same gym class" Sanji added in contempt.

"Who are the hearts?" I had to ask

"There something like teen royalty…check it, if Grand Line was US weekly, they would always be on the cover." Zoro strangely explained, though I still quit didn't understand.

"That one over there, that's Penguin. He is one of the dumbest guys you'll ever meet." I began to observe Penguin as he ran to catch a football that came flying in his direction, but soon after knocked him full on across the face. "Marimo over here had to sit next to him in English class last year."

Zoro leaned in closer to me and began to speak quietly "He asked me how to spell orange" he then chuckled and of course I did too because damn, really? What idiot couldn't spell orange?

"That other one, that's Shachi." I watched as Shachi walked across the field talking on his phone, paying absolutely no attention to the football that was flying straight for him. "He's totally rich because his dad invented the smiley candy…Shachi knows everybody's business, he knows everything about everyone."

"That's why his hair is so big, it's full of secrets." Zoro said warningly

"And evil takes a human form in Trafalgar Law…don't be fooled, because he may seem like your typical, selfish, backstabbing, dick-faced, ho-bag…but in reality he is so much more than that." I couldn't help but stare at this attractive Law guy who was being carried across the field by other guys and was so charmingly set down by them. He eyed them up and down before arrogantly throwing a wink to them as he turns around to stand with his two friends.

"He's the school prince, the star; those other two are just his little workers."

"Trafalgar Law…How do I even begin to explain him?" Sanji uttered

_Interview_

_"__Law is flawless"_

_"__He has two prada hats and a silver Lexus"_

_"__I hear his hair is insured for $10,000"_

_"__I hear he does car commercial…in Japan" _

_"__His favorite movie is Varsity Blues"_

_"__One time he met Johnny Depp on a plane—"the short boy with the fuzzy blue hat said, standing next to his best friend, Usopp. "—and he told him he was cute"_

_"__One time, he punched me in the face…it was awesome!"_

_End Interview_

We were now walking down the hallway again. The halls weren't as crowded as before thankfully, so maneuvering wasn't so hard. Sanji and Zoro continued to tell me more about these 'hearts' and just how evil this Law guy really was.

"He always looks fierce; he always wins Dressrosa King—"

"Who cares" Zoro interrupted

Sanji began to look distraught "I care! Every year the seniors from Grand Line and Amazon Lily throw a dance for the underclassmen called the Dressrosa Fling—"

"Whoever is elected Dressrosa Fling king and queen automatically becomes head of the student activities committee for their school—"

"And since I am an ACTIVE MEMBER of the student activities committee, I would say, yea I care!" Sanji retorted back at Zoro.

"Wow cook, you've truly out-gayed yourself." I couldn't help but chuckle towards that response.

"Here, this map is going to be your guide to Grand Line High, now where you sit is crucial because you got everybody there…" Sanji stated as he handed me the drawn map he made. "You got your freshman, preps, JV jocks, Asian nerds, cools Asians, varsity jocks, unfriendly black hotties—"

"—guys who eat their feelings, guys who don't eat anything, desperate wannabes, burnouts, the greatest people you will ever meet, that would be us…and the worst…beware of the hearts." Zoro warned as both of them left for their classroom that they were obviously late for.

Lunch finally came around, thank god because I have been starving all day. Thankfully this time I had a place to sit; now all I had to do was try and find them in this sea of jungle high schoolers. I scanned the cafeteria, passing through familiar groups Sanji and Zoro labeled on the map.

This first table I passed must have been the cool Asians, judging by the expensive clothing styles they wore. Like the map, the next group where the varsity jocks, arm wrestling over there hotdogs and fries while the rest of the group cheered. Right next to them where the unfriendly black hotties who were staring me down as I passed by. Then there were the guys that ate there feeling and guys who starved themselves-just like the map said. The burnouts, desperate wannabes-yup and yup this was them I said to myself as I walked past them, until I finally saw the table I have been searching for.

However right before getting to my table, I was stopped by Killer who wanted to ask me some questions. Well ain't that the first.

"Hey, were doing a lunchtime survey of new students, can you answer a few questions?"

"Okay" I said.

"Is your sausage juicy?" He asked as chuckling was suddenly heard behind me.

"What?" I didn't understand

"Would you like us to assign someone to juice up your sausage?"

I began to look around questionable "My what?"

"Is he bothering you? . . . Killer, why must you be so vile?" Law, the supposed star of the school questioned.

Killer looked back at Law with a teasing smile "I'm just being friendly"

A grunt was heard from the dude with the shoulder- length brown hair known as Shachi, who was seated on Law's left side "you were suppose to call me last night!" he whispered to Killer.

"Oi Killer! You do not come to a party at my house with Shachi, and then scam on some poor innocent guy right in front of us three days later…He's not interested…You there, do you want to have sex with him?" he directly asked me out of nowhere.

I looked from Law to Killer in mere shock. What the fuck was he talking about? Of course I don't want to have sex with this perverted creep! When did I ever say I wanted to?

"No thank you!" I aggressively spat back to Killer

"Good, so it settled. You can go shave your back now, Killer." Law firmly shooed him away

"Asshole" Killer mumbled as he walked back to his table

I watched as Killer left my sight, then shrugged my shoulders as I continued walking until Law begun talking to me again.

"Yo, wait, sit down…seriously, sit down" I looked towards Sanji and Zoro who were staring straight at me, urging me to come over. I couldn't help to look around nervously before finally deciding to take a seat across Trafalgar law. "Why don't I know you?"

Well so much for avoiding the 'hearts' I guess. "I'm new, I just moved here from Africa. I used to be home schooled"

"What?" Law wore a bewildered face

"My mom taught me at home—"

"No, I know what home schooled is, I'm not retarded….so you've never been to a real school before?" he firmly asked

I simply shook my head as a response, not really sure what to say. It was all still very weird for me to be sitting at the 'hearts' table as they small talked with me. Not to mention Sanji and Zoro who were staring me down the entire time.

"Shut the hell up, are you serious?" he leaned back on his seat as he continued to stare at me "Home schooled….thats really interesting….you're seriously really hot"

"…thank you" I didn't really know what else to say to that. No one's ever called me "hot" before, let alone by someone as good-looking as Law, what else was I suppose to say?

"So you agree…" he raised his eyebrow at me curiously "you think you're really hot"

Shit, when did I agree to that? "Oh, I don't know—"

"Dude, I love your necklace, where did you get it?" he abruptly changed the subject, finding better interest with the red beaded necklace hung around my neck.

"Oh, my mom made it for me—"

"So wait, if you're from Africa…why aren't you black?" Penguin, the airheaded one asked.

"For fuck sake, seriously Penguin you can't just ask people why they're not black." Shachi scolded the dumb one while smacking the back of his head.

Suddenly Law silenced them and looked at me "Sorry, could you give us some privacy for a second?"

"Yeah, sure" the three huddled in a small circle, mumbling words that I couldn't hear. I turned to look at Sanji and Zoro who were giving me strange looks from across the dining hall but all I did was shrug back to them. Suddenly, the 'hearts' stopped talking and all three leaned towards me placing their elbows on the table simultaneously.

"You should just know we don't do this often, so this pretty much is a big deal." Law confirmed

"We want to invite you to have lunch with us every day for the rest of the week." Shachi announced, wearing an honest smile on his face.

"Uhh…that's okay I—"

"Excellent, so we'll see you tomorrow." Law cut me off

"Oh, and on Wednesdays we wear green" Penguin said as all three of them stood up to make their leave.

In home economics, Sanji began to cry out hysterically through laughter. Nobody paid much attention to it though, apparently his loudness was a common thing in this school. I stood beside him explaining my lunch experience with the 'hearts' as he brushed a joyous tear from his eye and inserted a cake pan into the oven.

"Oh god…okay you have to do it! And then you have to tell me all the horrible things that Law says."

He said excitedly while still trying to hold back his laughter.

"Law seems cool." I was only being honest.

"Cool? That bastard is not cool, he's a scum sucking road whore, he ruined my life!" Sanji spat angrily at me.

"He may be cool, but he's evil…trust me" Zoro replied, eating a cupcake from a batch that laid on the table he was leaning on.

"Hey you're not in this class, get out of here!" the little dude known as Chopper snapped at Zoro. He was pissed because the marimo devoured one of his cupcake assignments that still needed to be graded before class ended today.

"Oh shit, it's Danny Devito! I love your work!" Zoro stuck his arms out drastically pretending to chase after him but only scared the poor kid away. I bit back a chuckle at Zoro's randomness, after I brought my attention back to Sanji, bringing up a question that I've been curious to ask since earlier this morning.

"Why do you hate him?"

"What do you mean?" he asked

"Law…you seem to really hate him." I repeated a little more clearly this time.

"Yes…so what's your question?" he began to sound irritated

"Well my question is why—"cut off again for the god knows how many times now.

"Law started this rumor that Sanji—"

"MARIMO! Shall we not!" he frantically shouted back at Zoro, cutting off whatever reason he was about to share with me. "Now look, this isn't about hating him okay? I just think it would be like a fun little experiment if you hang out with them and then tell us everything they say."

"What do we even talk about?" because honestly what do people like Trafalgar Law talk about? Even I don't know what to say most of the time in front of other people, let alone hot guys like him.

"Hair products" Sanji recommend

"Tom Hiddleston" Zoro suggested

"Is that a band?"

Sanji cut aside the nonsense of me trying to figure out what everything they were saying meant "Look, would you just do it, please!"

"Okay, fine…uhhh, by chance do you have anything green?"

"No—yes!" both replied. Zoro proudly declaring in satisfaction.

By 8th period, I was so happy to get to math class. I'm good at math. I understand math. Nothing in math class could mess me up. However, as I sat there giving Mr. Shanks my undivided attention, this one guy with tousled jet-black hair sitting in front of me turned around to ask me a question.

"Hey do you have a pencil I can borrow?"

It was like my entire world stood still as I stared at the guy in front of me. His eyes were a shade of chocolate brown with a small scar under his left eye that suited him perfectly. I've only had one other crush in my life. His name was Sabo and we were 5. It didn't work out, but this one hit me like a big yellow school bus

"Ace what do you say?" Shanks asked

He was…

"So cute…" Shit, shit shit, did I seriously just say that out loud!? Fuck, just shoot me now why don't you. The entire class turned to look at me strangely; even hottie was staring at me now. My entire face felt like it was heating up, causing me to frantically look around the classroom and stutter my words.

"I—I mean…uh…a-sub-n equals n plus one over four."

"That's right…good, very good…alright; let's talk about your homework."

Walking back home from school, I arrived to my house where both my parents sat outside on the porch reading and going over some paper work. I walked up the stairs, hoping that they wouldn't notice me as I sneaked inside.

However, my father managed to stop me right in the nick of time "Hey how was your second day?"

"Fine" I replied with a smile

"Where people nice?" my mother then asked

"No" I shook my head.

They both looked at each other in concern before my father spoke up again. "Did you make any friends?"

"Yeah" I responded as I stepped inside leaving both my parents in complete confusion.


	3. Chapter 3

Having lunch with the hearts was like entering another world and this new world had a lot of rules.

"You can't wear tank tops two days in a row and you can only wear hats once a week…so I guess you picked today." Shachi said. But it wasn't my fault, how was I supposed to know? This was my favorite hat; I'd wear it every day if I could. "And we only wear basketball shorts and sweat pants on Fridays." He paused.

"Now, if you break any of these rules, you can't sit with us at lunch. I mean not just you, any of us!" He leaned in a little closer to me "…Okay, let's say I was wearing jeans today, I would be sitting over there with the art freaks." Shachi pointed his head towards Zoro and Sanji's table. Sanji was throwing grapes into Zoro's mouth and every time he would catch one, Zoro would clap like a seal. "Oh, and we always vote before we ask someone to eat lunch with us because you have to be considerate of the rest of the group. I mean, you wouldn't buy a shirt without asking your friends if it looks good on you."

"I wouldn't?" I asked confused.

"Right! It's the same with dating…you may think you like someone, but you could be wrong…" Shachi eyed Law next to him while saying this last sentence; he then began to look down at his food with slight disappointment.

_Flashback_

_Sophomore year, Shachi and Law where in the restroom just barely coming out from gym. Shachi had decided that now was a great time to openly confess his feeling to his best friend, however things didn't go exactly as he planned._

"_What do you think of Monkey D. Luffy?" Law asked, touching his under eye bags while looking in the mirror._

"_He's such a weirdo" Shachi answered._

"_I think he's cute"_

"_He's TOTALLY cute!" he quickly agreed._

_Law took a couple steps back from the mirror to get a fuller look at himself. "I'm going to make him my boyfriend."_

"_Huh!?...Law…I.." he began to stammer._

"_Spit it out, you're killing my mood."_

"_I love you!" Shachi shot back at him. He was looking directly at him through the mirror while his hands clenched tightly to the edges of the sink._

"_No you don't" Law replied bluntly. He had yet to look at Shachi directly, even after his sudden confession._

_Shachi quickly turned around to face Law. "I do! I've loved you since I first met you—"_

"_Shachi, you don't love me, you worship me. You want to be me, you're obviously confused."_

"_No, but—"_

"_Enough! You're wrong." Shachi stared at Law confused and hurt. "You. Are. Wrong."_

"_Yeah, you're right…so when are you going to talk to Luffy?" Shachi smiled back_

_End Flashback_

I sat there trying my best to soak in every rule Shachi just threw at me. In all honesty, there were just too many damn rules to follow. Since when did rules like these apply to my social standards of fitting in? In Africa I fit in just fine with any click.

"So Ace, are you gay?" Penguin randomly asked. I was taken back by how straight forward he was, nevertheless in a place so public where even the walls had ears.

"I…uhh…" I hesitated

"He's gay. I caught him checking out Law's ass yesterday" Shachi smirks as I begin to blush furiously.

"…128 calories and 48 calories are from fat. What percentage is that?" Law asked

"48 into 120?" Shachi questioned

"I'm only eating food with less than 30 percent from fat—"

I grew irritated with their inaccurate equations, "Its 40 percent." They look at me as if I grew an extra head or something. "…well 48 over 120 equals x over 100 and then you cross multiply and get the value of x."

"Fuck it, I'm getting cheese fries." Law shrugged his shoulders in an uncaring way as he walked away from the table.

It was just me and the other two now and I just sat there expectedly waiting for more rules to be shoved down my throat. However, what Shachi said next was definitely not what I had prepared for.

"So, have you seen any cute guys yet?"

Though, I was more than happy to share with them seeing that they were my friends. And friends share things like this, so what did I have to lose.

"Well there is this guy in my calculus class—"

"Who is it!?" Penguin eagerly asked

"His names Luffy" I reply with a smile

"No!" Penguin and Shachi both cry "You can't like Luffy, that's Law's ex boyfriend. They went out for a year…Law was devastated when Luffy broke up with him last summer." Shachi explained.

"I thought Law dumped him for Eustass Kidd?" Penguin questioned

"Irregardless, ex-boyfriend are off limits to friends…don't worry, I'll never tell Law what you said. It'll be our little secret." Shachi promised as Penguin nodded in agreement.

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Even though I wasn't allowed to like Luffy, I could still look at him, and think about him, and talk to him...The bell rang, everyone was up from their seat and heading out the door. I picked up my books and followed Luffy from behind, trying to get closer to him so I could start a conversation.

"Hey Luf—" my chance was soon cut off though, by some blond guy with a pineapple like face.

"Hey, you're the African guy, right?" the Luffy blocking, blond guy asked.

"Yeah"

"I'm Marco, captain of the Grand Line mathletes. We participate in math challenges against other high schools in the state and we can get twice as much funding if we had more members…you should think about joining."

"Oh, you'd be perfect for it!" Mr. Shanks smiled

"Uh…yeah, okay" I agreed

I made my way outside towards the playing field. Luffy was there shooting some archery with the rest of the team. After his shot, he made his way back in line, but soon stopped when he noticed me not too far away. I waved to him and he waved back with his charming wide smile that stretched from ear to ear. I remained standing there as he slowly made his way to me; however I was broken from my daze when a loud honk was heard behind me. I turned quickly only to be met with Law and the rest of the hearts.

"Get in loser, were going shopping." Law shouted. Eagerly I jumped in the back seat with Penguin, leaving Luffy standing alone.

We arrived to the town mall. The place was ridiculously huge filled with so many stores, food courts and…people. I wanted to look around the entire place, but unfortunately I was stuck with the hearts instead, which really wasn't all that bad.

"So, how do you like Gran Line?" Penguin asked

"It's cool. I'm going to join the mathletes." I replied

"NO!" all three gasped at the same time

"No, no, you can't do that. That's social suicide…honestly, you're so lucky you have us to guide you." Law stated as we continued to make our way in the mall.

We stop by a fountain where people around our age were sitting and chatting with one another. It all appeared very familiar from back home. Being at the mall kind of reminded me of being home in Africa. By the watering hole. When the animals are in heat.

"Oh my god there's Killer" Shachi alerted in shock "and he's with Conis Skypiea"

"I heard they're going out" Penguin confirmed while Shachi appeared to look rather hurt.

"Wait. Killers not going out with Conis…no, he can't blow you off like that. He's such a vile little cockroach, hand me you phone, Shachi."

"You're not going to call Killer are you?" Shachi questioned slightly panicked. Law shooed him away as he held the phone to his ear.

"Hello, may I speak to Conis Skypiea please." We stared at him anxiously till he began to speak again. "This is Eric from planned parenthood. I have her test results, if you can have her give me a call as soon as she can. It's urgent. Thank you." He hung up the phone and handed it back to Shachi "She's not going out with anyone after her dad gets through with her"

Penguin and Shachi busted up laughing as they followed Law outside. I was about to follow when I noticed Conis stand up from where she was sitting with the phone pressed to her ear. She looked worried up until I saw her mouth the words 'dad' than I knew what was about to go down. Quickly I made my way back to the group to get the hell out of this jungle.

Law drove into this ridiculously huge gated mansion surrounded by trees. It had a Spanish type of vibe now that I actually thought about it. No way did Law live here? This place was made for a king, err..not that Law wasn't worthy of being one. Point was I've never seen anything like this before, all I wanted to do was run inside and scope out every inch of the place.

"Your house is really nice!"

"I know" Law agreed as he walked up the steps to his house.

"Make sure to check out his dad's pectoral implants, there hard as rocks" Shachi whispered into my ear. I nodded a bit disturbed.

Entering the Law residence was like a dream come true, unlike anything I've ever imagined. The entire place was overly decorated with fancy Spanish paintings, vases, brown wooden furniture with floral arrangements in orange, yellow, red, brown and green spread all around, and lets not forget the huge rug that hung over the living room as decoration. Oddly enough it suited the place very well.

Speaking of the living room, as we were passing the living room we were met with a little girl with green hair dancing in front of the TV screen to some music video that was clearly inappropriate for her age.

Once we reached the kitchen a large man came out from the other side, sporting a hideous pink feathered coat as he walked around to greet us.

"Hey hey hey. How are my best guy-pals!?"

"Hey Doflamingo, this is Ace" Shachi introduced

"Welcome to our home" he suddenly pulled me into a crushing hold all made thanks to his ridiculously pointed nipples. Fuck, those damn things could take an eye out if you weren't careful. "Just want you to know if you need anything, don't be shy, okay? There are no rules in this house. I'm not a regular dad; I'm a cool dad, right Law."

"Please stop talking" Law coldly command

We followed Law upstairs and into his bedroom. Once again I was left in complete shock; the room was ten times bigger than my entire kitchen itself. Law and the other two began making themselves comfortable by taking off their shoes; Law threw off his shirt, showing off his well toned body and tattoos…wait tattoos?

"Hey, put Pandora on." He commanded and soon after some guitar beat began to play loudly all across the room. I on the other hand kept myself busy by looking at some photos Law had tapped to his walls. One caught my attention immediately, a photo of Luffy stretching his arm out to take the picture with Law holding onto him as they both smiled. Guess it was true what Shachi said about them two dating once.

I heard Penguin gasp in disgust and I immediately turned around to see what the problem was. He was standing in front of a long mirror poking at his nose with a scrunched up face preaching about how long it was. Then soon after Law and Shachi joined him to the mirror of shame and began making criticism of their own imperfections. Shachi began complaining about his red hair being damaged and Law was complaining about his dark bags under his eyes, personally I thought they looked good on him.

They all turned towards me with an expectant look of self complaint but in all honesty, I had nothing I necessarily hated about myself. Coming up with the first thing that popped into my head, I confessed about my small hatred for my narcolepsy. They didn't say anything after, just stared at me like some kinda martian.

Just then the bedroom door flew open, welcoming in Law's tall disturbing father. "Hey you guys, happy hour if from 4-6!" he singsongs happily, carrying a tray with glasses and red liquid inside them.

I took mine and observed it cautiously. "Thanks…um…is there alcohol in this?"

"Oh god my boy, no. What kind of father do you think I am? Why do you want a bit? If so, I'd rather you do it in the house."

"Uh, no thank you"

"Alright then" he takes a seat on the couch. "So guys, what is the 411? What has everybody been up to? What is the hot gossip? Tell me everything. What are you guys listening to? What are the cool jams—"

"Dad! Could you shut up already and go fix your coat or something" Law spat back at him.

His father didn't seem at all taken back by his sons demand.

"Okay" he got back up "You guys keep me young, love you so much" and just like that he finally left the room. However, shortly after another gasp was made by Penguin who was standing next to Law's book shelf.

When we all turned to see what his deal was, he was already flipping open an odd looking book in his hands. "Oh my god guys, I remember this!"

"Oh wow, I haven't looked through that in ages" Law said as he made himself comfortable on his giant bed.

"Come check this out Ace, it's our burn book…see, we cut out guys pictures from the yearbook, then we would write comments below." Shachi began to explain while flipping through random pages until he stopped at one with some dude named Johnny.

"Johnny is a grotsky little bitch" Penguin murmured

"Still true" Law commented

"Iceburg is a fat virgin"

"Still half true" Shachi and Penguin began to chuckle.

I didn't understand what any of this meant, who the people where or what troubles they brought to the hearts. However, what I did manage to learn about this said Iceburg guy was that apparently during freshman year, he was ridiculously overweight and soon after got into sports and just dropped it all overnight or something. I guess losing all that weight still didn't help him get laid.

"Sanji Black, pathologically jealous curly freak" Suddenly I caught myself rereading that line over and over again, because jealous? Sanji? That almost seemed hard to believe, Sanji didn't seem the type to be so obsessed, nevertheless with someone.

"Wait, is that Zoro?" Penguin asked, bringing me back to reality. He was pointing at Zoro who was sitting behind Sanji in the same photo.

"Let me see" Shachi pulled the book closer to his face "Oh dang, you're right it is Zoro. Gross, whats he doing hanging around with that jealouse blond? He's definitely lowered his popularity big time"

"Guess he's almost too gay to function" I joked, not thinking anything of it.

"Hah! That's a good one, write that in their" Law commanded

Oh no, maybe that was only okay when Sanji said it. I began to bite nervously at my straw as I watched Shachi write down the what I just said about Zoro. God, this was bad, why did I have to open my big mouth. Well, there was no use worrying about it now, and it was not like anyone else from school would ever see this book. So really there was nothing to worry about.

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Two hours later I found myself leaning on a counter at the food court in the mall, sharing my productive day with the hearts to Sanji and Zoro. Sanji worked part time at one of the food stands; a small booth with an odd name 'Hot Dog on a Stick'. He said he was the assistant manager of the place, so me leaping over to the employee's side and talking about my day wasn't going to be a problem for him.

"And they have this burn book where they write mean things about all the guys in our grade."

"What does it say about me?" Sanji asked

Remembering what they wrote about Sanji, I came to the conclusion that it was better to keep my mouth shut about it. I was just looking out for a friend, what he didn't know won't hurt him.

"You're not in it." I lied

"Those bitches"

Zoro came out of nowhere and stood between us with a corn dog and a packet of relish in his hands. "You think this would taste good on my corndog?"

"No! Condiments take away the foods flavor…" Sanji yanked the relish away from him and threw it into the trash. "Ace, you gotta steal that book."

"What!? No way." I nearly shouted

"Oh come on, we could publish it and then everyone would see what an asshole Law really is."

"I don't steal" I huffed and turned my head to the side to avoid eye contact with Sanji. Zoro was now standing beside me with a can of sugar in his hands, ready to pour it onto his food. However, Sanji was already one step ahead of him and yanked the can away.

"That's for your drink, idiot moss head…Ace, there are two kinds of evil people. People who do evil stuff and people who see evil stuff being done and don't try to stop it."

"Does that mean I'm morally obligated to burn that guys outfit?" Sanji and I turned in the direction that Zoro was staring and sure enough a man walking by was wearing what we could all agree was the most outrageous piece of clothing ever. "Oh shit, that's Mr. Shanks!"

"God, I love seeing teacher outside of school. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs." Sanji whispered next to Zoro.

Shanks was about to continue walking, when he soon noticed all three of us standing on the other side of the corn dog stand. He looked surprised to see us as he made his way over.

"Hey guys, what's up? I didn't know you worked here?"

"Yeah…corn dogs are my calling." Sanji said sarcastically.

"Shopping?" Zoro asked

"No, I'm here with my boyfriend" he said and pointed at some random old stranger with a long white beard and blue bandana sitting on a bench across from looked at Shanks shocked at his choice in men. "Joking…sometimes older people make jokes"

"My kendo teacher takes his wig off when he's drunk" Zoro said as he took a bite from his corndog, finally.

"Your kendo teacher and I have that in common…no actually, I'm just here because I bartend a couple night a week down at Shakkys Rip Off Bar" we all began to chuckle and act as if we were interested in his conversation. "…Ace, I hope you do join the mathletes, you know because we start in a couple weeks and I would love to have a normal guy on the team, so the team could look like their normal for once."

"I think I'm gonna do it." I said happily to Mr. Shanks

"Awesome! I'm very glad—"

Zoro cut in and pulled me towards him by my shoulders and began to shake me with an alerting tone in his voice "Ace, you can't join mathletes! Its social suicide!"

"Thanks Zoro" shaking his head and looking directly at Zoro with a scolding look. "Well, this had been sufficiently awkward and I'll see you guys tomorrow." Shanks looked towards me one last time with a kind smile before turning on his heels and walking away.

"Oh man that is bleak" adding emphasis on the 'k' "So, when are you going to see Law again?" Sanji asked

"I can't spy on him anymore, it's weird"

"Come on, he's never going to find out. It'll be like our little secret." He leaned forward with his head resting on his fist and one eyebrow perked up as he wore a charming smile. Damn, this was bad. How did I ever let myself get into this kind of mess?


End file.
